Sitting on the side of the mountain after climbing the Buddhist temple, I had slowly emerged out of another deep meditation when I realized leaves had been falling on my head. As I looked above me, there sat, ate and played a large group of black with white rimmed eyed, monkeys. Not at all concerned with me being there, they only began to move away slightly once I stood to leave and enter back into the mountain for the long stairway journey to the bottom.
During the year and a half before hand, I had been going into longer and longer periods of far away meditations lasting hours at a time, reaching beyond the body and beyond the mind. The wild monkeys in Malaysia were not afraid of me or disturbed by my presence because essentially ‘I’ was not there. My consciousness had merged with the mountain’s. Later the temple caretakers were very surprised to hear that the monkeys had come to me, saying that the black monkeys did not like humans and rarely showed themselves. After going to this temple daily for a month it was the first time I had ever seen them.
I had by this time, tuned into an unbelievably profound sense of peace, awareness of all that was going on in the world, clarity of what laid ahead, both in and out of a meditative state and an immense amount of love for everything. I often explain that during these years I had ‘left this world’ but eventually I needed to came back. My new life ahead awaited me and I was ready to face it’s new challenges but from a whole new perspective. It wasn’t always like this though….. Continue reading “A Journey of Healing and Awareness”→
Sometimes in life, we just need to breathe and let go…..
The need to hang onto the reins and to control things, is just another way of us trying to find security in what we are doing and what is happening in our lives. It’s when that sneaking inner anxiety and fear about the future is slowly making it’s presence known but you are not aware of it yet. The tension and stress that you may not even notice in you, slowly starts to come to life. You start to notice that you are controlling everything around you and that you are hanging on to the reins.
Unfortunately in riding and in life, if what we are doing is an action driven by fear, it only produces more fear in the horse. This is where no matter what we do, we keep sending signals of insecurity, control and tension and this keeps bringing back to the same response to us from the horse. Continue reading “Letting Go”→
I have been working for a while now as a Dressage rider and coach. I went from learning how to ride bareback, no bridle, no helmet and on my own as a young child, to working with animal behaviorist, Andrew Maclean, to living and working/riding under old school Classical Dressage trainers in Germany, to owning my own stables in Australia. I have since been head coach for stables in Japan, Malaysia, Singapore and recently in Jakarta, Indonesia.
Throughout all those years, working with all these different horses – young to Grand Prix, Show Jumping, hobby riders, to Western riders, beginners and professionals, different religions, cultures and even in different languages – there is one thing I came to realise;
Riding is one of the only sports that develop areas of the brain that connect with intuition, awareness, instinct and feel. When you rely upon forms of interference within your own body as well as the horse’s body, you cut off this ability to intuit what is happening. You cut off the most powerful form of growth available to us with horses – awareness.
How often have we been asked the question – What is your worth?
What is your value?
How much are you worth?
We are born into a society that teaches us to go to school, learn, study, find a job to survive in life and then one day you may have enough money saved up to do what your heart actually wanted to do in the first place.
It is a society that bases our self worth and the belief of what we are meant to do to earn a right to survive on this planet and in the amount we earn for the work we do, whether we love that work or hate it.
Just under 8 yrs ago, I sat and watched the shock and horror on the face of a truly gifted woman playing a huge part in my then business and Dressage Training stables, Equinoxe Equestrian, when she told me that I could NOT use the word Spiritual in the new brochures! She was afraid that we would lose all the clients from the equestrian world and sure enough, she was right ;-). I didn’t however lose the clients who were benefitting from me fully embracing the truth of who I am and what I believe my Soul came here in this life to be and do. Those clients are still friends today and have become great teachers and riders themselves.
Have you ever wondered why certain behaviors happen with your horse? Maybe a situation in your life is effecting you or repeating itself?
I once was plagued with a back pain from injuries obtained throughout a stressful, grueling and difficult career in working with horses.
My path to healing led me down numerous tracks. At first I was in complete denial and searched in whatever medical way I could to escape the pain and continue my beloved work. This did not last and after one day getting off a horse and realising I could not feel both my legs I was pushed to more action. Shortly after this surgeons were telling me I would need to change career and I could not ride again, I kept riding but I also began to search deeper. Accupunture, water physiotherapy, herbs, pressure point therapy, mental coaching and many, many anti-inflammatory tablets!
On the 12th of October in Milan, Italy, a day for us all to remember for a very long time was in the making. The night before, after receiving some information as to why the majority of these men were in prison, due to my own inner fears of not being able to be present without judgment, I woke up in a panic at 4am thinking that I really should not go. I did go and I would not be who I am today if I didn’t. Here is a small expression of a day in a prison made of light and its profound healing it brought to us all.
People had been asking me for a long time before my visit ‘Why was I going to a prison?!’ For me it was very simple –
I believe we all have a responsibility in this life to help each other in whatever way we can.
I went into this place knowing nothing of who these men were, their pasts or their futures and only was told statically what most of them were in here for but I did not know individually. I had to go in with an open heart and let go of any judgments or perceptions of who I thought these men were. If you can look beyond your own ego it is easier to look beyond the ego in others and here is where we can see the truth of each others pain. I ended up spending 8 hours there with this extremely wonderful group of inmates, program leaders and their horses.
The freedom to be who we are. The freedom to soar across the sky untouched and unharmed by anyone or anything. The freedom to exist as we are, the freedom to be loved and to give love. The freedom to live without judgment- from the outside and from within. The freedom to honor your truth and your life purpose. The freedom to BE YOU.
Who is truly free? Do we all exist in this life in a bubble of fear? Who really is soaring within and living the true calling of their life? Continue reading “FREEDOM”→
Picture yourself standing in front of a solid brick wall, now push against it as hard as you can. Now imagine every morning when you wake up start pushing against this wall, keep pushing until the end of the day and return to bed. The next morning wake up again and start pushing against this wall all day then sleep again at night. Everyday wake up and spend the day pushing this wall. How long do you think you could do this for?
Do you think you would get tired? Maybe your body might get fatigued or stressed? Would you be happy? Would you become angry or frustrated? Would you feel helpless and sad?